October 22 – November 21
Finding Your Way To Intimacy
by Barry Kerr, evolutionary astrologer
Each month, Barry explains the sign for that month and then lists all 12 signs and how each interacts with this month’s sign. Look for your birth sign below. (These can also hold true if you have your Moon, Ascendent and/or a number of planets in the sign.)
Scorpio is the sign of deep intimacy, with others and with our self. Our commitment to relationship in Libra invited this deepening of bonds that merge our self with others. Such merging can involve sex, money, beliefs, values, goals, or more, and creates a symbiotic dynamic with another person, as typically experienced in a marriage. Unlike in Aries, where our Martian willfulness was free to follow our own impulses, fending off the will of others, now in Scorpio, we are more sensitive to our desire to maintain loving connections to others, and therefore we are challenged to consider and incorporate their desires with our own. The more we perceive our valued interests to be entwined with the other person, the higher the stakes seem and the more vulnerable we may feel. It is in this emotional and psychological vulnerability that Scorpio invites us to transcend and transform our ego.
When our desires align in harmony with a partner, we can easily feel the synergy of mutual love and trust that reflects the reality of our souls’ divine oneness with each other. However, when our desires conflict in opposition, we are faced with a primary choice. If we limit our consciousness to our ego’s illusive perceptions of 3D separation, we are likely to revert to the Martian warrior stance of self-protection in Aries and experience the conflict as a win or lose battle with an enemy. This is the stuff of melodrama, power struggles, abuse, co-dependence, withdrawal and loss of love and trust.
However, if in this vulnerable conflict, we choose to stay consciously present to that field of love that keeps us attuned to our immortal soul, which is impervious to the illusive harms of this world, including death, we are then able to perceive our adversary as another similar soul, a divine extension of our greater self. From this higher perspective we are free to respond to the situation by revealing our ego’s fears, inviting a deeper, more intimate response from our self and others. We can invoke our intuitive and synergistic power to create solutions for us from beyond our ego’s illusion of separation. This is what the planet Pluto represents in us. This crucible of vulnerable intimacy, repeated throughout our lives, is what stretches us into spiritual consciousness, remembering that we are divine beings who are having a human experience. Sometimes we do stretch and then integrate this consciousness into our day to day lives. Sometimes we remain in fear and then retreat into limited ego perception, feeling wounded by love, fearful of vulnerability and we put on a mask of invincibility. Yet, despite our fear of intimacy, we cannot help but be drawn back to it. It’s what we came to do
Aries (Mar 20 – Apr 20)
Aries, you are keen to take the initiative in joint projects and shared experiences, including sex. Be aware that this can be a way for you to maintain distance, protecting yourself from the feelings of vulnerability that threaten your ego and provoke unwanted battles. During this month, be aware of this and see if you can find opportunities to let down your guard, trust more, and let someone else take the lead. Revealing your fears and asserting your needs can help a partner address them with you.
Taurus (Apr 20 – May 20)
You bring the qualities of comfort, stability and pleasure to your intimate relationships, Taurus. As Scorpio and Taurus are opposite each other, look for ways that a partner can influence your values, your sense of security, and your self-esteem. Remember that adapting to other people’s desires and ideas does not require you to change what you most value about your self. You’re building a life, not a fort.
Gemini (May 20 – June 20)
Gemini, your natural tendency to scatter your curious attention can at times also be a defense mechanism, protecting you from vulnerability and deeper intimacy. During Scorpio, apply your love of learning to your self-awareness while with a close relation. Listening intimately requires your heart be involved. Find ways to share vulnerably with loved ones without letting conversations turn into mere intellectual exchanges. Be curious about the heart and how it can be attended to. Emotional intelligence is an important component of your education, but you must connect your head to your heart.
Cancer (Jun 20 – Jul 20)
Cancer, you are at home in the gentle and emotionally supportive pond of water that your sign represents, but Scorpio is a deep river of water, appearing calm on the surface, yet raging and dangerous deep below. So Cancer, here’s a chance to bring your deepest feelings to the fore. If you have any sense of emotional insecurities remaining in my life, now would be a good time to find a trusted loved-one or guide to help you dig deep. Find out what’s missing, what you can heal, and what you can ask for from others. Remember that “I AM LOVE” could strengthen all your relationships.
Leo (Jul 20 – Aug 20)
Leo, you are enthusiastic and creative in joint projects and experiences, which can be delightful at times for your partner. At other times, it could feel a bit overwhelming and demanding. During Scorpio, find a way to share the limelight with a co-star. Intimacy is a dialogue, not a monologue. Vulnerability is stepping onto the stage without a script. You needn’t hold back on your passion, rather expand your source of inspiration to include your partner’s soul, too.
Virgo (Aug 20 – Sep 20)
This is a good time, Virgo, to bring your intention for clarity and perfection to how you handle your intimate relations. Asking a sexual partner for cleanliness is fine, but expecting emotions and feelings to be clean and orderly is not. Emotional intimacy can get messy, and sometimes everyone involved needs to get wet. So, rather than worry about cleaning up the mess, put your focus on how the mess was made. Just avoid getting too analytical. The heart has it’s own logic.
Libra (Sep 20 – Oct 20)
So Libra, if the Scorpio experience is the natural outcome of your desires for relationship, then this ought to be an easy-peasy part of the cycle, right? Well, yes, it is easy for you in one sense. You are more likely than most to stay committed in the face of conflict and adversity. At the same time, it can feel more painful for you because you have a low tolerance for disharmony. In a way, this sets you up, more than most, to succeed in the transformation of your ego. Staying committed to your “enemies”, for you, means making peace. Just make sure you aren’t capitulating to their ego. That peace will not sustain. Lasting peace will be created by conscious souls.
Scorpio (Oct 20 – Nov 20)
This is your month, Scorpio. It’s a good time for self-examination. With Scorpio as a dominant theme in your birth chart, there was obviously a soul intention in this lifetime to dive deeply into the themes that Scorpio presents. Start with this question: How much do I still hide my own feelings and fears behind a mask even as I am obsessed with what other people are hiding? Your answer may be an invitation to get real, reveal and let heal. Scary? Of course, but it’s also your fulfillment.
Sagittarius (Nov 20 – Dec 20)
Sag, your passion for truth can be inspiring to others, including your intimate relations. During this Scorpio month, pay attention to the difference between general truth (like philosophy, religion, metaphysics, etc) and personal truth (eg, “My stomach is in a knot”, “I feel afraid of …”). Espousing beliefs does not typically invoke vulnerability or intimacy. In your desire to create closeness and trust, lean into the inarguable personal truth of the body and emotions. They will inevitably lead you back to a higher vista of cosmic awareness.
Capricorn (Dec 20 – Jan 20)
Capricorn, your natural abilities to take responsibility and create order are probably highly valued in your relationships. Others can lean on you. However, during Scorpio, watch for a tendency to want to maintain control. Managing joint finances is one thing. Managing emotional or sexual intimacy is quite different and not recommended, unless requested. It avoids vulnerability. Try to loosen up and let go. What’s the worse that can happen? If things get out of hand a bit, you’ll probably be able to whip things in shape again.
Aquarius (Jan 20 – Feb 20)
You are typically prone to avoid intimacy, Aquarius. It’s your desire to remain objective and free from the emotional distractions that cloud your intuitive visions and idealism. Trouble is, without emotional intimacy, your inventiveness remains disconnected from humanity. Use this time in Scorpio to stretch your ability to be sensitive to feelings, your own and others. Explore some dimension of your own vulnerability and share it with a trusted partner. Try to be more sensitive to the feelings of your teammates. Tune into their souls.
Pisces (Feb 20 – Mar 20)
Pisces, if Scorpio is about surrendering ego to soul, you have a head start. As the third water sign, Pisces represents an infinite wide ocean of divine oneness, without boundaries. Thus, when it comes to vulnerability and intimacy, you may need to pay attention to where the boundaries need to be. If someone is worthy of your trust, then surely let compassion and forgiveness rule the day, but let those feelings create the container and not cut short the necessary personal emotions that your ego must express. Denial of ego is not intimacy. Revelation and recognition of ego is.
Barry Kerr, a certified soul-based astrologer, has over 40 years of experience with an international clientele, including many medical professionals and alternative healers. He and Kristine Gay, a licensed psychotherapist, are owners/practitioners Choose Conscious Living in Sedona, AZ. Both have extensive training in soul-guided healing of mind, body, heart and spiritual systems. Barry offers astrology, energy healing and transformational coaching by phone, Zoom, or in person in Sedona. Inquiries are welcome. Visit www.ChooseConsciousLiving.com for more information or email Barry at Barry@ChooseConsciousLiving.com.